May 02, 2002

WHY AM I NOT SURPRISED?
Finally, Congress has somewhat meekly voiced its support for Israel.

The Senate version of the bill was symbolic and largely omitted language from the House which placed blame on Arafat. Despite the watering down in the Senate, two members voted against it:

"The two most senior Democrats, Sens. Robert Byrd of West Virginia and Ernest "Fritz" Hollings of South Carolina, still opposed it, however, saying it ignores Israeli responsibility and the plight of the Palestinians.

Hollings even likened Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon to Iraqi President Saddam Hussein because he refused to allow a United Nations team into Jenin to evaluate the destruction there."

Amazing. Hollings and Byrd. Hollings is the go-to boy of the Hollywood elite and is probably bitter from the abject failure of his proposed legislation which would have essentially made your computer the property of Disney. Byrd is a former Klansman. You cannot make this stuff up.

April 09, 2002

BLAME THE VICTIM
Hey, are you tired of seeing a sizable chunk of your hard-won earnings going to The Man? Well, I hate to tell you this, but it's all your fault.

In unrelated news, you have also been implicated in the death of Santa Claus.

March 28, 2002

MAKE IT STOP!
I recently completed the digital whirlwind of mayhem known as Grand Theft Auto 3. One of the many attractions of the game is that you can interact with (read: bash the heads of) passersby, rival gang members, prostitutes, etc. My favorite soundbite from the game comes from the cab drivers, who are almost all of South Asian extraction. Anyway, the cab drivers are fond of yelling, "hey moron!" with Apu-like authenticity.

The trouble is, I can't get the "hey moron!" bit out of my head. Whenever I hear someone quip, as if for the first time, "We really need to find out what motivated the terrorists to harm us..." out pops "hey moron!" When I hear otherwise intelligent folk advocating that Israel follow up on the Arab world's offer to have "normal relations" my skull splits with a chorus of thousands of "hey moron!"

I am nothing if not mild-mannered and polite, even in the face of sheer idiocy. If only I had the chutzpah of the ones and zeros flitting around in my Playstation 2 to say what I really mean.
NATURAL SELECTION IN PROGRESS
This just in from the wire:

    Also Thursday, about 600 pro-Palestinian foreigners,
    mostly European members of a group called Public
    International Protection, arrived in Ramallah, saying
    they hoped to serve as human shields against any
    Israeli action.


Gee, I hope they fare better than the two TIPH (Temporary International Presence in Hebron) observers, who were gunned down in cold blood by Palestinian Authority police.
THE ONLY THING WORSE THAN BEING GOOGLED IS NOT BEING GOOGLED
I have to wonder about the people who have been accessing this blog in recent days. It appears that a number of them found their way here in a fruitless search for pr0n.

One searcher arrived on these rather vanilla shores by way of a yahoo search for "Indonesia maid s3x" (where 3 = e for purposes of slowing the tide of pr0n-hungry searchers).

Another one, at an Arabic-language IP, made his way here looking for the phrase "all cop are bastard", which appears to be a reference to a similarly-titled song by the Oi! band The 4Skins (or was it the Cockney Rejects? I can't remember). I never realized that skinhead culture was all that popular in the Arab world, but in light of recent events, it kind of makes sense...
WORST... HAS-BEEN... EVER!
Wow, Arafat now says he's willing to agree to a "cease-fire" with Israel.

So which Arafat is "offering" this grand gesture, while the stench of hate and death still fills the sea-side resort town of Netanya?

Is it the same Arafat who takes no responsibility for the actions of the terrorists in his midst (and in his own organization)?

Is it the same Arafat who released from jail the unreconstructed sick fuck responsible for the Netanya massacre?

Is it the same Arafat who financed and supplied war materiel to anti-Israeli forces as early as 1948?

Is it the same Arafat who plotted a series of deadly hijackings throughout the 1970s?

Is it the same Arafat who used Lebanon as a base for terror attacks on Israel in the 1980s, thus requiring the Israelis to invade Lebanon?

Is it the same Arafat who supported Saddam Hussein?

Is it the same Arafat who silenced dissent in his own movement by jailing critics?

Is it the same Arafat who ordered his personality cult to leave the Arab League Summit when it became clear it would not be a forum under his control?

Pardon the rhetoric. I just cannot escape the feeling that Arafat and his supporters do not realize the gravity of the situation at hand. In the aftermath of the Passover bombing, a survivor tried to assist a woman who was injured by the blast. She refused his help, saying "How can you help me? I don't have legs.'' At least the woman had the presence of mind to realize her time was up. It's a pity Arafat doesn't acknowledge his own fate so stoically.
AGAIN WITH THE SWEATPANTS
It seems like the issue of reparations for slavery pops up about once or twice a year these days. Most recently, a woman in New York has filed a claim against a number of corporate entities on grounds they profitted from slavery.

For a variety of reasons, I don't believe reparations for slavery are, as Wilford Brimley might say if he were not trying to mainline Quaker Oats, "the right thing to do". For some specific reasons, I feel that trying to seek judicial remedies for slavery is strategically a lost cause.

If nothing else, this issue gives me the chance to spew out some of my writing. The piece is a bit dated, and not as clean as I'd like, but I think it's a fairly balanced (if that's possible) take on the whole issue of just how to deal with the problem.

UPDATE: Tony Woodlief has addressed this issue with more tact and eloquence than I could muster on a day when even the nice voices in my head aren't screaming for an orgy of violence to fall upon my enemies. Read his bit instead of mine.

March 27, 2002

ANOTHER ONE BITES THE DUST
Looks like Gun Control Central has thrown in the towel. The City of Boston has opted to drop its frivolous, groundless lawsuit against the firearms industry. I hope residents of Beantown are pleased to learn their taxes were being spewed away at a rate of roughly $30,000 per month.

UPDATE: Jersey City, NJ, has decided to bring a lawsuit against gun manufacturers. Talk about your bad timing. Let me get this straight. After seeing countless cities bring these suits either lose outright or drop them altogether, Jersey City is just now deciding to hop on the bandwagon? By Jersey City's logic, it's now a great time to invest in a dot com startup.
BEEN THERE, DONE THAT
This article describes the about-face by Washington University School of Law, which previously tried to withhold scholarship funds from graduates choosing to work for the military.

Here is my favorite part of the article:

      But the head of OUTLAW, a student group that supports gay and lesbian rights,
      said the reversal violates principles he believes the School of Law should defend.
      T.J. Hill said the decision would open the door for financial assistance for
      graduates who work for organizations like the Ku Klux Klan.

You mean the decision will provide funds for graduates who choose to work for the ACLU? The horror!
IN LAW SCHOOL, THEY TEACH US ANALOGIES...
Fresh on the heels of yet another suicide bombing resulting in the deaths of several Israelis, Jesse Jackson has offered to mediate the "conflict" between the Palestinians and Israel.

Ahem.

Am I putting it too bluntly when I say that putting Jesse in such a role would be like allowing a defrocked Catholic priest to mediate a conflict between Jeffrey Dahmer and a naked, 15-year-old Laotian kid? Or like letting the Hell's Angels provide security at a Rolling Stones concert (oops)? Or like allowing folks who couldn't get hired at Wal-Mart to be in charge of airport security (oops again)?

One can easily imagine the result of a Jesse-sponsored resolution. First, every major public works project in Israel must be handed to a contractor who happens to be a friend of Jesse. Second, countless unexplained mini-Jesses are born at hospitals throughout Israel and the West Bank. Last, Jesse and friends receive full pardons from whatever UN-selected president replaces Sharon.

Creepy, isn't it?
I am back.

January 04, 2002

PUZZLING SITE VISIT DATA

I've done some semi-Orwellian checking up on the few folks who are actually landing on this site. The top three visitor types are as follows:

1. people using Google to look for pictures of Elmo,

2. people linking from other blogs (thanks to Ye Olde Blogge, Daimnation, Libertarian Samizdata, and Tony Pierce),

and

3. employees of the State of Idaho.

So, by way of a vague greeting to my small bevy of frequent fliers, I'd like to say, "Sorry for the Elmo mixup, thanks for linking, and please say hello to my Uncle Jim in Boise."

Thanks.

January 01, 2002

WELL, THAT PROBLEM IS SOLVED...
coffee break?

Boy, I hope Congress is content with the recent federalization of airport security. It has really worked out well, except for those security breaches and all. Let's see, in recent days we have: the guy who managed to go through several checkpoints with a loaded 9mm pistol in his carry-on luggage, the suspension of two Denver International Airport screeners who let a man pass without going through the metal detector, the unspent round found on an airport concourse in Florida, mass firings of convicted felons in the screener ranks, the DOT's easing of minimum requirements for employment (no high school degree required, for example), etc.

It's safe to say that the federalization of airport security screeners is working about as well as our glorious national rail system and envy of the free world, Amtrak.

December 23, 2001

SNEAKER BRANDS VIE FOR TARIQ RAJA SPONSORSHIP DEAL

Air Nutjob
Unidentified sneaker rep takes Raja/Reid to undisclosed location for negotiations.

In the wake of the failed attempt to detonate shoe-deployed C-4 on board an American Airlines jet bound for Miami, Nike, Adidas, and New Balance have dispatched representatives to Boston to attempt to secure a sponsorship deal with Sri Lankan/British/Jamaican wingnut Tariq Raja/Richard Reid.

A high-level official with Nike, speaking on condition of anonymity, remarked, "If we can get the new 'Nike Air Tariq C-4 Extreme High Tops' on the shelves before spring, we're confident we'll be able to corner the market on terrorist-themed athletic footwear."
IT'S OFFICIAL: OSAMA BIN LADEN CLEARED IN SEPTEMBER 11TH ATTACKS

The hunt for Osama Bin Laden was summarily called off early this morning when reports surfaced detailing that Osama's mom doubts the evidence against her son.

"I believe the evidence against him is not solid,'' said Osama's mama, Alia Ghanem. Wife Number Four to Saudi multi-zillionaire Mohammed Bin Laden went on to aver: "I don't believe that he did the terrible deeds they say he did.''

Well, that settles it, then.

In unrelated news, Pol Pot's barber has come forth with the startling news that he was innocent, after all.